Mark: 0:00

Welcome to RPG Blokes, the Lishmaster live play, and we're heading in toward the end game. So last session, they've fled from Frugalhorn and the refugees, the survivors from the attack on their village have made it to La Maison Talle. And it wasn't just Silas and Gelato that went over the waterfall, many others did, but none others survived. these two somehow survived the drop through the water form and were dragged out of the lake at the bottom by monks and other survivors that had taken a safer route walking down the side of the cliff 99s all around wasn't it last.

Little Mark: 0:51

Last session 99s all around and i should have i should have followed steve's advice and got the plot armor and gone with one of the pcs that's what i should have done if i if i'd have done such a thing i would have lived.

Stephen: 1:01

Getting into a very important person's coracle.

Little Mark: 1:03

I had faith in my my fellow my fellow character and he killed me i.

Barry: 1:08

Feel like a lot of responsibility has been put on silence here for what you know we all knew there were risks involved especially.

Mark: 1:19

Gelato let's be honest.

Little Mark: 1:20

Yeah i want to die in glorious death not in not in not in some pond it.

Mark: 1:25

Looked risky but you had a fake point didn't you.

Little Mark: 1:28

I did i did have a fake.

Mark: 1:32

So you've got no fake points left. So this entire, all of these end sessions, we're going to try and see whether you can get the most inglorious, unglorious death possible.

Barry: 1:40

It'll be a mundane death.

Mark: 1:43

Yeah. That's what we're looking for. Gelato is the least he deserves. Hasn't been at the races, has he?

Little Mark: 1:49

I haven't been, no. I haven't had my glorious death that I've been seeking.

Mark: 1:53

But a death, I think, is pretty much guaranteed if you see a fake point.

Little Mark: 1:56

Yeah. Yeah.

Mark: 1:57

No spoilers.

Little Mark: 1:58

Hopefully I can take John with me.

Mark: 2:00

Yeah. Yeah, you're either being pulled from the lake or walking down the side of the cliff to the bottom, to the valley, where the monastery of La Maison Tal is. So there are about 40 monks that live here, and all of them are active now, coming to help the refugees. And there's a lot of people that have lost loved ones here. Looking at the main survivors, you can see most of the people that you'd expect to survive did. Alan de Goscoyne obviously came down with you.

Stephen: 2:31

Dorian.

Mark: 2:33

And Cecil Chumley, the Albion noble, he's also somehow made it back. Gimbrin's there, so is Bardak. Shalia, Moonhand, the elf, makes it back too, as well as her sycophant, Alibi Shutz. She's quite disappointed he didn't get himself killed. is.

Stephen: 2:52

He um sorry the guy took his hat is he.

Mark: 2:55

He's made it there that's um i've forgotten.

Barry: 2:59

About the hat for a minute.

Mark: 3:00

Yeah i.

Stephen: 3:01

Was kind of hoping maybe went over the waterfall but.

Mark: 3:04

I'm on larue and the widow larue they both shared the same coracle in fact it was their coracles they shared with the rest of you and arman is there and you've the hat is safe is it are you held on to it yeah i to.

Stephen: 3:18

Put it in the bottom of the coracle.

Mark: 3:19

Okay yeah.

Stephen: 3:20

Pop it back on me when i get down the bottom.

Mark: 3:24

Yeah, that's it. You're going to just flaunt it.

Stephen: 3:26

I've probably forgotten it's his by now.

Mark: 3:29

Okay. I'll tell you what, he hasn't. He's fully aware.

Stephen: 3:34

Well, he should. To be fair, he should just forget it.

Mark: 3:36

Fuck the Lichmaster. This is the major plot arc of this campaign. The end of the game with a wink and a look. The final boss. Yeah. Okay. And a lot of the other standard villagers, shall we say, The Briox, the Giscards, the Korthyams, the Wernickees, although their leader, or the head of their family, Emmerich, is there and is intact. But there has been a lot of people dying. The dwarves are decimated. They were decimated before this. They lost a load of their men up at the mine, remember. And only seven dwarves plus Bardak and….

Jon: 4:15

You're about to say that.

Barry: 4:17

I was going to say that. Only seven dwarves?

Mark: 4:22

I'm not Andy Dwarf, as I was pointing out in the previous podcast.

Little Mark: 4:25

Well, you killed me falling off a cliff, so I think Andy Dwarf.

Mark: 4:28

Yeah, seven dwarves, you know their names, I don't need to tell you. And also, well, you've got ten all together, because you've got Gelato and you've got Gimbrin and Bardak as well, are all intact. So Frugalofen has fallen, and this ragtag band of survivors has arrived at the monastery of La Maison Talle. the monks do what they can to treat the wounded and comfort the bereaved but you would know that the undead may only be a few hours behind you all so these monks are scurrying about tending to to you all organizing hot food and blankets and the bulk of the refugees are being billeted in the cottages around the monastery you and many of the more prominent npcs are going to be accommodated in the monastery building itself. So it's over to you really how you want to interact. It's, You know a lot of the personalities. You also, at one point, I guess you'd want to meet with Fact Hunt. So probably the first thing would be that Fact Hunt turns up. Waylon's not around at the moment. He's out foraging for food.

Stephen: 5:31

Dead then.

Mark: 5:33

At least my character is not dead. What, Armour? If I've got a coracle, make sure you get in it. That's all I can say.

Jon: 5:39

Well, you lot have been wasting your time. Yeah, I found out all the things. Come wandering down, just ignoring all the havoc going on around me. I'm taking a beeline for... Well, the faces are recognised. Obviously, I don't know Gerlato yet.

Mark: 5:56

No, but he might just look to you like one of the other dwarves, unless you have a familiarity with dwarven culture and the fact he's a troll slayer, mate.

Jon: 6:02

Not really.

Mark: 6:03

No, okay.

Jon: 6:04

Other than student drinking games, I don't know. So, waving this sheaf of papers that I've temporarily pulled in, you lot have been wasting your time. I guess you didn't find anything. The librarian here has got everything, everything you wanted to know. We should have spent more time here before we went out. Again, ignoring all the bodies and people all around. Not there.

Mark: 6:30

I have knowledge.

Jon: 6:32

I've obviously got hair all over the place. I've fallen asleep at some point. I've got letters inked over its face. We've fallen asleep on books.

Barry: 6:41

I think I would have preferred to have spent my time in a nice, cosy library. Thank you very much. Yeah.

Jon: 6:46

I found a background for the mountains behind it. And you've got to avoid the mountains. You can't go into them because you're here and alive. So that's really good. If you'd gone into them, you'd run into a load of undead. There's this guy that's...

Mark: 7:06

He's totally acting totally inappropriately. And he doesn't know the half of what you guys have gone through. He can just see the...

Jon: 7:13

Well, this is it. He doesn't know shit.

Mark: 7:14

Yeah, nothing at all.

Stephen: 7:15

Undead. No shit.

Jon: 7:16

I say yeah see so who'd.

Barry: 7:19

Have thunk it yeah.

Jon: 7:21

There's this guy heinrich he got thrown out of mull and he came here and form of had a bit snot out of him blasted him into bits but he still lived because he messed up with chaos i think and and he's been out there no shit raising up all sorts of nonsense in revenge and you guys have got a few old didn't you what's going on no i said, I mean.

Barry: 7:49

That is a statement of fact hunt. I'm going to take this opportunity to introduce fact hunt to gelato along the lines of... Useful but eccentric.

Stephen: 8:03

Crazy. He means crazy.

Jon: 8:04

Really? I didn't think we're at all useful or eccentric. Well done.

Little Mark: 8:10

Is John playing another young character?

Mark: 8:12

You're all young. They are all young. This is 17 and 18.

Stephen: 8:16

Yeah, this is origin story.

Mark: 8:17

Yeah, this is your origin story.

Little Mark: 8:20

It's going to be my death story. That's what it's going to be.

Stephen: 8:23

Origin and completion.

Jon: 8:24

You haven't even got artwork, bitch. You don't have to worry about it.

Stephen: 8:29

Well it's good to see you fact hunt anyway uh yeah.

Mark: 8:33

Does anyone need healing a monk says it's looking in amongst you yes.

Little Mark: 8:36

I i do no.

Stephen: 8:37

I'm fine actually.

Mark: 8:40

Okay when he does a bit of healing on you there's a couple of monks comes and tend to you uh hold on.

Jon: 8:46

While you're wet.

Mark: 8:47

Yeah i.

Little Mark: 8:48

Suppose anyone has any healing drafts looking about mark don't they healing draft.

Mark: 8:52

They can um get healing drafts for you they don't have them here They have a very small amount and they will use them on the people that they think are going to be most instrumental in helping the defence of La Mezantara.

Stephen: 9:04

With fake points.

Jon: 9:06

Well, on that subject, I think there might be something in the crypts. what yeah dead bodies that no well yes also that it's not not probably not best idea i want to see more.

Stephen: 9:19

Dead bodies we've seen a lot of dead bodies.

Jon: 9:21

Well you've.

Barry: 9:23

Been poking.

Jon: 9:23

Around those mounds i told you.

Barry: 9:24

Can i just i like in character i want to go uh the first thing we need to go is go and talk to the dickhead that gave us this job was his brother what was his name john luke.

Mark: 9:37

Barrys John Louis Dintranz is the Bretonian monk that sent you on.

Barry: 9:43

The job. My position is, did he knowingly send us out into that fucking hellstorm? And if he did know, or even suspect, are we not entitled to give him a bit of a slap?

Stephen: 9:56

And are we still getting paid?

Jon: 9:57

I don't think he knew what the two would be linked up.

Barry: 10:02

I'm not for sure. I'm not for sure. I thought he was iffy from the off.

Mark: 10:09

Wasn't going.

Stephen: 10:09

To go himself was he so yeah.

Mark: 10:11

It is something you can you can find out because you're inside the the la maison tile so you you eventually will get to speak to him he wants to speak to the most able people amongst you all uh yes there's not much to be left with but a feeling that you know he's definitely sent you to your death whether he's done so intentionally or not as another matter he sent you to go and find out about the tombs he didn't tell you to enter them he just said to document where they are and if you if you do want to go inside be careful i.

Jon: 10:41

Don't yeah he didn't specifically say don't go in.

Mark: 10:44

No we.

Little Mark: 10:46

Didn't go in we didn't get anywhere near said to they.

Stephen: 10:48

Came to us it's.

Jon: 10:49

All right then.

Mark: 10:50

Yeah i think we play that out when you eventually get to meet him unless barry unless you think silas would want to do that immediately uh you know find this guy what's what's silas going to be doing because i'm about to introduce a lot of the other npcs uh that you know of and give you an opportunity to interact with them if you want to or not um but if you i'll start with silas here if you did want to try and make a beeline for him for for the master i.

Barry: 11:17

Don't think i want to make a beeline for him but i would like certainly for the three of us that were sent out here um to be on the same page as to when we do get to have a conversation with him because i've got the hump with him.

Mark: 11:30

Okay, so what do the rest of you feel about that, then? It's something that you can quickly discuss. Well, it would only be that, and Dorian really has got skin in that game, isn't it? I think Fact Hunt looks like he's away with the fairies anyway, so whatever's happened to you, he's not really feeling very responsible for. What do you think, Dorian?

Stephen: 11:45

I think we could use it as an opportunity to get more money, I'm thinking.

Jon: 12:10

Well, if we can beat the rush, there might be something in the crypt where the old abbot was buried.

Little Mark: 12:18

Wait, wait, wait, wait. Shouldn't we be getting ready for the massive horde of undead that are coming down the hill?

Jon: 12:22

This could stop it.

Stephen: 12:23

Shouldn't we continue running to the nearest city?

Little Mark: 12:25

Or am I going to be dealing with all them myself?

Jon: 12:27

So he beat the guy... No, he defeated the guy before. I'm very careful here.

Stephen: 12:37

Who are you talking about?

Jon: 12:38

The former Abbot, here.

Stephen: 12:40

Where is he?

Jon: 12:42

Well, he's dead, but he's in the crypt.

Stephen: 12:44

Fucking useful, isn't it?

Little Mark: 12:46

Dead. I agree here with Dorian. You want us to go into a crypt to find someone that's dead.

Jon: 12:55

Well, that's usually where you find them, yeah.

Little Mark: 12:57

And what are we going to do once we find this dead person?

Jon: 13:01

Find either a clue or the thing they used to defeat Kimler before Was it a.

Stephen: 13:07

Massive great big sword?

Jon: 13:10

We can only hope Well that won't be I think it was magic I think it was magic, He used the staff or something that crippled him before.

Little Mark: 13:21

A staff Right So what we go down there get tooled up, come back, die in a glorious way against the undead. Yeah.

Jon: 13:34

Or go straight for Kimmer if we can.

Little Mark: 13:36

I'll have him. He's mine.

Jon: 13:38

Sure.

Mark: 13:40

So you're overheard having this conversation by other monks, particularly Padre, Father Padre. And he would come over to you, fact-time. He says, hey, you trust these people with this information? We want the most adept people here. we've.

Jon: 13:56

Got the ones that are more likely to be doing it I.

Mark: 13:59

Think we dragged those two out of the lake look at them.

Jon: 14:03

So chafing at the bit for revenge surely that works or breaking issues.

Mark: 14:07

Get some of those dwarves involved the other ones from the Mayan they're the tougher ones, Go and have a chat with them, back time.

Jon: 14:18

I'm not exactly a leader of men or anyone else.

Mark: 14:22

No, I know that. That's obvious. You can go and have a chat with the dwarves, though. Tell them when they're needed. We can't get them in. We told them to come here and talk to us, but they don't want to. They're building defences around the walls.

Jon: 14:36

We don't need defences. We need the walls. More walls.

Mark: 14:41

And he looks at the rest of you with disgust.

Stephen: 14:44

Okay.

Mark: 14:45

Yeah he doesn't he's father padre is the old librarian that fact hunters had to put up with for the last two days i.

Jon: 14:53

See it as my book daddy but let's go.

Mark: 15:00

So as i said i wanted to just introduce you to a few of the other people that made it down that have been brought within the walls of the monastery the others will all come within the walls of the monastery if an attack was to happen but at the moment they're being looked after in some of the buildings on the outskirts and around the valley you've got cecil de ver chamley and, he's filling his bag with some food there's not a lot of food to go around because they they forage everything so everything has a lot of man hours going into it every meal effectively takes time and he you you would see him filling up his bag with an inappropriate amount of food looking over his shoulder, if anyone wants to approach him the Albion Toph that has his personal friends with the Duke of the Paravon.

Jon: 15:47

Are you taking that for other people or.

Mark: 15:49

Ah, hello, chappies. I'm just keeping an eye out for these bony blighters. What? Fill up.

Stephen: 15:57

Feed some for us.

Barry: 15:58

Not much chance of you looking bony without a stash, is there?

Mark: 16:03

Well, I thought someone ought to raise the alarm, and I need some food to be able to get down to Paravon. I'm fairly nimble on the old pins. Probably reach Grenier within the day and get to the Duke. Splendid fellow, by the way, personal friend.

Little Mark: 16:16

Mark, I'll walk over there and take the bag off him, and I'll be going, you, my son, will be fighting with me in a glorious death.

Stephen: 16:25

Hang on, hang on, hang on. Hang on. He knows the Duke. And does the Duke have lots of... Has an army?

Mark: 16:31

Yes. Yes, the Duke has an army. Somebody's got to get down and tell him.

Stephen: 16:34

Give it to him.

Mark: 16:35

Yes.

Stephen: 16:36

You go get the army.

Jon: 16:38

It'll be too late.

Barry: 16:40

This guy ain't coming back with an army. He's legging it.

Little Mark: 16:43

Yes. And it's only two or three hours away. He's legging it.

Mark: 16:46

I'm not licking it. I'm no use in the scrap. I only get in the way.

Stephen: 16:49

I take some bread out and take some stuff out and then give him back the bag. And I put it in my own bag.

Mark: 16:54

I've got to travel for at least a day and a half.

Stephen: 16:58

Yeah, you can go. That's enough there. Go get the army.

Mark: 17:00

Okay. I better go.

Little Mark: 17:01

You won't be here in two days.

Barry: 17:02

If that guy comes back with an army, I will eat the stolen hat.

Stephen: 17:07

What stolen hat?

Mark: 17:12

Yeah, exactly right. Then off. See you. he grabs what he can that means he's happy to take his bag with something in it and he's exiting.

Barry: 17:21

Yeah him gone.

Mark: 17:23

Yeah you're happy to let him go better.

Stephen: 17:25

Off without aren't we.

Mark: 17:26

Really I'll scratch him from the battle roster then there goes Chumley better.

Barry: 17:30

Off without I know I know our odds have just plummeted but he is going to get an army.

Mark: 17:36

Yeah but that would be no good to us yeah.

Jon: 17:41

Hang on, have you been waking things up? Why are all these people here? What's going on? What?

Mark: 17:47

Good God. What's he running away from?

Stephen: 17:51

Have you been smoking those books? Come on.

Jon: 17:54

Certainly not. But what?

Mark: 17:57

So there is a battle roster, and this battle roster determines the outcome of the battle, if it was to occur.

Stephen: 18:02

Mr. Chumley, would you like to... No, he's gone.

Mark: 18:05

He's gone. He's got one leg over the wall.

Stephen: 18:08

All we need to do is hold out for a day or two, and he comes back with an army, okay?

Little Mark: 18:12

He's not coming back with an army.

Stephen: 18:13

He might be coming back with an army. If he didn't go, he would never be coming back with an army. There is a chance.

Mark: 18:21

Okay, the next one is Shalia Moonhand and Albie Schutz. We've seen her too far away from... She's having a few minor wounds treated.

Little Mark: 18:31

She can sort off.

Stephen: 18:33

Come on, we've got to keep somebody. I think the elf's...

Little Mark: 18:36

We should have kept the guy.

Stephen: 18:37

No, no, no, no, no. He could go get an army.

Little Mark: 18:40

She's useful i beg your pardon we don't need loot playing whilst we're dying.

Mark: 18:46

Who got who got best with her it was it was silas wasn't it you you did interact with her quite a bit she she seemed to have something in common with you are we on the.

Barry: 18:56

Borders of bretonia do you have significant levels of competence and swagger.

Mark: 19:02

Though bretonia.

Jon: 19:06

Doesn't that have uh, a certain amount of elves all but infesting the woodlands.

Little Mark: 19:13

Yes, Nazlurian.

Mark: 19:15

Yeah, there's no woodlands here. You're in the Grey Mountains.

Jon: 19:18

Damn it. Yeah, but is that closer than this supposed duke?

Mark: 19:21

Oh, no. So you're in between the Empire and Protonia, so this area has a certain amount of autonomy. They don't pay taxes here, for instance.

Jon: 19:31

So the duke has got no interest or reason to save...

Mark: 19:36

The Duke de Paravon will come to the rescue. That pretty much is a given it's just going to tell him all about it is not that easy and to mobilize an army to get here but yeah the duke to paravon would would come he's the one that would yeah yeah they are mainly plutonians here and this is a threat potentially not just to this region but to to either the empire or plutonia itself so that there would have to be some kind of mobilization to deal with a power this large.

Jon: 20:08

Unless we can just novel whoever's in charge of it. You say the dead have been raised already and you didn't go poking around in the burial man.

Stephen: 20:20

Didn't need to.

Barry: 20:21

We did not go poking around.

Stephen: 20:24

Unless we get paid if we say we did. I don't know. We technically didn't know, but we might tell him what we did.

Barry: 20:33

That's such a bad line though, isn't it? I mean, technically we didn't.

Mark: 20:38

You didn't really, as Shalya says, but others may have done. You were just one of many groups sent out from here. If the result's the same.

Stephen: 20:44

Then it doesn't matter who did it. If it gets Riverwald, then it's ours.

Jon: 20:48

So the other parties that got sent out, if any of them turned up with the...

Mark: 20:53

No, one of the monks says, you're the only group to be here, but you were sent to the closest location. and the others went further afield, they will be returning soon.

Jon: 21:05

No, if they see undead in the way.

Mark: 21:08

No.

Barry: 21:11

A small number of them may be returning soon. If they were further away than us, they're either going to have to go through the undead horde or the undead horde is behind them, catching them up. Those are the only two joining.

Stephen: 21:27

The undead horde.

Mark: 21:28

They will have to return.

Barry: 21:29

Joining the undead horde.

Stephen: 21:30

Yeah. We might see them.

Mark: 21:32

They will have to return here. So, I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Um, when Boney and his little friends came to call, I've done my best to fight to save myself. Make no mistake about that. Now this little hovel is looking very much like another wrong place to be. So I'm not waiting around for another wrong time to come along. Besides, all these dwarves. Not nice.

Jon: 22:00

You could certainly use a dab hand with an arrow.

Mark: 22:04

She shakes her head. She's getting some healing. And yeah, she is a mercenary. She's made that clear all the way along and not really engaged too much with anybody apart from silence.

Stephen: 22:14

It sounds like pay, yeah. Supposed to be paying us. They might pay you.

Mark: 22:19

It's not the job I'm after. She talks to Silas. It's the job you've got. You come with me, if you like, Silas. I know a way through the mountains back to Israel.

Barry: 22:32

Annoyingly, this may not be the best decision I've ever made, but my loyalties are here. My skills are needed here. I will be staying here. I'd be sad to see you go, but I do understand that this is not your fight.

Mark: 22:46

She just nods and albie alongside her looks very happy that you're not coming because he sees you as a potential rival to to now obviously in.

Jon: 22:57

Character i've not met him but i was listening to the recording he seems to be a another scholar he's.

Little Mark: 23:04

A wet rag that's what he is.

Jon: 23:05

That's what i said damn it.

Mark: 23:07

Yeah he's a part he's a poet and he's in the state melancholy so yeah he does, he's not a fighter he's no good in a fight but he he'll just follow her pathetically wherever she goes and writes poems and reads them to her she she totally funny but.

Barry: 23:22

I was that far away from doing that i.

Mark: 23:23

Respect it i think albie knows that so when you say you're not coming he just gives you the most awful look you know somebody that even though he can't fight he would have he would have done something that.

Barry: 23:36

Has fucking pissed me off with brother what's his face even fucking more though.

Mark: 23:40

So she's going and i think you know that she is definitely very very able keeping her here and having her help defend the monastery would be a massive bonus i'm.

Jon: 23:53

Just going to pay her my share.

Mark: 23:57

She just laughs i'm.

Barry: 23:59

Just going to ask her to reconsider once.

Mark: 24:02

I'm just.

Barry: 24:03

Going to ask her to reconsider once for i don't know glory and fortune Okay.

Mark: 24:09

That doesn't pay the bills. No, I might be staying.

Barry: 24:12

Fortune fairly much pay the bills.

Jon: 24:15

But a brand sheet, does that have any value if you're looking for further work?

Mark: 24:20

No, I do not offer to die for anything close to what you're being paid. It's certainly not enough.

Jon: 24:27

Oh, not die, but, you know.

Barry: 24:30

Just get maimed.

Jon: 24:31

Until before the last wall falls, in which case...

Mark: 24:34

You either leave now or you're stuck here. It's a death trap. that undead army i've seen them just as just as you have there is no chance for the people here.

Jon: 24:44

There is a chance and i'm looking for you lot again look rather than sit around here arguing can we go and check out this one lead of something that actually defeated this guy well.

Stephen: 24:58

We've got to persuade everyone not to leave us so it's a so we at least have a chance.

Jon: 25:04

Enough and blunts not out the person that's raising things that that'd be a morale booster.

Little Mark: 25:10

So you want to go down there, get this thing, and then come back up?

Stephen: 25:13

Are you going to go run out with the Staff of Withering?

Little Mark: 25:16

I'll do it.

Jon: 25:17

Whoever can use it.

Stephen: 25:18

Yeah, I know you'll do it, but yeah, you'd do it. You probably need people around you.

Mark: 25:23

A lot of the villagers have got no choice. They're not leaving, so they're having to fight. The dwarves are definitely staying. In fact, that's the last encounter really we need to play out before we can move on to an encounter potentially with John Louis, is with the dwarves who would want to go and speak to them because you'd have to go to them it'd be something that you could interact with Mark it would make sense I guess that they've actually got.

Jon: 25:46

Higher fellowship than me I don't think I'm the person I can.

Little Mark: 25:51

Go and chat to the dwarves before we go.

Mark: 25:53

Down anybody else can be there as well this will be during the course of the initial preparations and they're playing a big part in this so you can go and visit them Gimbrin and Bardak are there, Silas as well I guess that Gimbrin.

Barry: 26:07

I would want to go and see Gimbrin for sure.

Mark: 26:09

He's pleased that you've survived and you've made it.

Barry: 26:12

Yeah.

Mark: 26:13

Not going to.

Barry: 26:14

I'm going to, I'm going to pat him on the shoulder and tell him that I'm surprised that he made it.

Mark: 26:19

Why would you say that? No, no, no.

Barry: 26:22

This is what we call a joke. Get used to it.

Mark: 26:26

Oh, human humour. I understand, right? It's like a Vulcan then, didn't it? It was, um, he, he, Bardak's there too, and you can see that they're reinforcing the walls here of the monastery. So we're going to be ready for them this time, no matter how many there are, where they come from. And we haven't got long, a couple of hours at most, we calculate. They're wiping out every living thing as they go, and this place is next, for sure. They forced us from our mine, and they forced us from the manling village. But here it stops. They shall not have our valley They shall not have our bones For their filthy ranks Not while there's a breath In one dwarven body to prevent it.

Little Mark: 27:11

I'll nod. I'll nod. Apparently, these humans know of something in the crypt that might help us, so I was going to go with them unless you want my help to fix the walls, or?

Mark: 27:19

You've done enough damage around here, one of them says. And you notice that one of the dwarves missing is Stonehand, the one that you...

Little Mark: 27:27

We didn't talk about that.

Mark: 27:29

He didn't make it to the monastery, no.

Stephen: 27:35

A lot of them didn't.

Mark: 27:37

Yeah, but he... I mean, you don't know why he's not here. he's quite, you know, he's noticeably missing because he was a wheelchair-bound dwarf. He didn't quite make it down. Yeah, yeah. Okay. So they are interested in talking to anyone with some military experience to, finish off these walls with them, places where they can be defended.

Jon: 28:00

Read about it.

Mark: 28:04

They obviously look at you and just ignore that. They don't see gelato as a warrior so they don't see you they see you as a failed um but you would be an academic, an engineer that's what they see you as on somebody that's taken the oath that so they don't take anything they don't they particularly want to cooperate with your gelato then you are called to an audience with a john louis and he is calling in particularly the four of you, and nobody else. He just wants to speak to you.

Stephen: 28:39

Wow.

Barry: 28:39

Okay, we make him wait 15 minutes.

Mark: 28:43

Very corporate of you.

Jon: 28:45

But why are we going to this guy?

Barry: 28:47

I'm not having some prick that just sent me to my death to lick his fingers for a little chat.

Stephen: 28:52

Be fair, you are still alive, but...

Barry: 28:56

Well, I mean, only on the outside.

Stephen: 29:02

So it's a difficult one to sell. If you don't turn up, I could say you died.

Barry: 29:06

Yeah.

Stephen: 29:07

And maybe get a bit more cash.

Barry: 29:08

Yeah, but then later on, we can just say that I got better.

Stephen: 29:11

Yeah, you died, don't know.

Barry: 29:13

It's an absolute classic. I don't want to be kowtowing to this motherfucker. I don't know how everything else feels.

Stephen: 29:21

I'll take your lead on this. I mean, you're quite an intimidator fella, so.

Barry: 29:24

Yeah, yeah, we make him wait at least 15 minutes. So I'll tell you what we should do. We should go and wash up and make ourselves look presentable and arrive at our leisure.

Mark: 29:34

So I'm just tracking our father's skeletons away, right? 15 minutes, did you say?

Jon: 29:38

Yeah. This is it. We could be looking for the way to actually defeat this guy rather than going for a meeting.

Stephen: 29:45

Maybe we could do that in that 15 minutes.

Little Mark: 29:48

Well.

Jon: 29:48

Yeah.

Barry: 29:50

What, go and look in the crypt?

Stephen: 29:51

Yeah, yeah.

Barry: 29:52

Yeah, no, that's a brilliant idea. Let's go and look in the crypt first.

Stephen: 29:54

Make him wait. Make him wait. We can say what, yeah.

Barry: 29:57

Yeah, but don't tell him that's what we're doing. only if we find something relevant and yeah, I like it I like it, I like it, I like it a lot Okay.

Mark: 30:06

Where's the question?

Stephen: 30:08

Underneath, of course.

Little Mark: 30:09

Normally underground, isn't it?

Mark: 30:12

Yeah.

Stephen: 30:12

Where's the crypt?

Mark: 30:14

You don't know where the crypt is.

Stephen: 30:17

Lord, in fact, how long have you been here?

Little Mark: 30:19

Where?

Jon: 30:20

Well, since you left.

Stephen: 30:22

That was a rhetorical question.

Mark: 30:24

Do you call it in fact hand?

Jon: 30:26

I still can't see a dice roller on this thing. Got a dice log.

Mark: 30:31

Don't worry. When you have to roll a die, worry about it. Anybody that knows where the crypt is, He tells you to go and see Jean-Louis Dean Trance. He's waiting for you.

Little Mark: 30:40

That sounds like a dodge.

Mark: 30:42

And I suppose what we could do is give the quest to the NPCs if you don't want to go there. And then you can do something else. But he wants to speak to you. You don't have to speak to him. I don't mind playing it out that you've got the hump with him.

Barry: 30:55

I want to speak to him because I want to give him a piece of my mind. But I want him to stew a little bit of weight.

Stephen: 31:01

Two minutes late.

Barry: 31:03

How many?

Stephen: 31:04

Two. Two.

Barry: 31:05

Two? Fuck off.

Stephen: 31:07

Three.

Barry: 31:09

It's got to be at least... Listen, we all know that it's only room...

Little Mark: 31:14

I don't want to add any pressure to the whole thing, but there is an army coming at us.

Stephen: 31:17

Why don't you just be 15 minutes late and just turn up halfway through? She has to re-say everything he said.

Barry: 31:24

Do you know what? I'll go with that. I'll go with that. I do want to fuck with him, but I do understand that time is of the essence.

Stephen: 31:29

Yeah.

Barry: 31:29

I'm going to get washed up because they made such a fuss about the state we was in last time.

Mark: 31:37

So everyone's going to go to them. Effectively, you've just sidelined Silas from the meeting. So you've actually done...

Barry: 31:41

No, no, I'm going to time it so that I literally come in halfway through.

Mark: 31:46

All right. Honestly, I'm with you on this because I'm pretty sure when this adventure was written, Graham Davis wrote this, primarily, I think, that they didn't consider just how badly the monks look at this point in the scenario, just how much amnocity you may have toward them, particularly the leader. it's not factored in at all and it's the first thing i thought about here and on when we interview him i've got this on in the list of things to ask him what the hell was going on with these monks they've.

Barry: 32:14

Been they've been rude and hoity-toity on multiple occasions that like yeah and and sent us to our probable death.

Mark: 32:22

Probably knowingly yeah yeah and then you're not meant to fuck off and and i'm not and.

Barry: 32:27

I'm not meant to feel a kind of way about it i feel a kind of way about it.

Mark: 32:31

I I think so. And you didn't like him in the first place. I can only imagine how badly this is going to go.

Barry: 32:35

In fact, I was a bit surprised because, um, Jean Louis was actually the most reasonable and out of all of them.

Mark: 32:41

Yeah. That's true.

Barry: 32:42

There can't be all that pomp and circum, pomp and ceremony going on around him without his fucking knowledge.

Mark: 32:50

Yeah. Okay. Well, you're about to find out, but you're turning up late to the meeting. So yeah. Yeah. Then you arrive at, the rest of you arrive for the interview with the master. So you're in the same room as he was before. Whereas you were here earlier a few days back, it was very tranquil. The monastery was, was a lovely place to have arrived at after your long journey through the mountains. And you had the, the early mounting sunlight drifting, shining through his window. and he's at his desk but now he looks very worried the room is dark and morbid the outside is beginning to look you know you can hear the sounds of panic and pain outside and the shouts of dwarves trying to organize the defenses and the whole the whole scene is now more like a battle battle scene this is almost like a a war a meeting of war uh and he looks up at you he says i i believe i know what is going on. Please be seated, my friends. Where's he from? He's from Catania.

Little Mark: 33:55

Is he?

Mark: 33:56

Yeah.

Stephen: 33:57

Very good.

Little Mark: 33:58

What province?

Mark: 34:00

Paravon.

Little Mark: 34:01

Paravon? Is that wrong dialect?

Mark: 34:03

Paravon? Is it?

Stephen: 34:04

Paravon.

Mark: 34:05

Okay. And if I am right, the undead will almost certainly come to la Maison Tartre. He just nods.

Stephen: 34:14

Have it translated for us, please.

Mark: 34:15

Speaking Britannian the leader he has a, Sorry, I can actually get rid of that, but it put me off. It put off my brilliant French accent.

Stephen: 34:26

Go again. Take two. Come on.

Little Mark: 34:28

Go.

Mark: 34:29

All right. Let's finally balance this. So the leader has a score to settle here.

Little Mark: 34:39

Here?

Mark: 34:40

Or here?

Stephen: 34:41

Yes.

Mark: 34:42

Yeah.

Stephen: 34:43

Yeah.

Mark: 34:43

He is known to us. He has had a run in here in decades, decades past.

Little Mark: 34:53

Why has he turned up now?

Jon: 34:56

Revenge.

Mark: 34:57

It appears he did not fully die. I do not think he was put to rest properly and his body was never found. And yes, I think it is his revenge.

Little Mark: 35:09

Right. Is it true you've got something in the crypt that we can deal with him with?

Mark: 35:14

Well, as you see Father Padre here and your friend here, your young friend, fact month he is a they have found something interesting it relates to our crypt yes, 40 years ago when the previous the previous monk head monk here was fighting the man who we believe has raised this undead army, Heinrich Kemmler is his name, He was defeated by the previous head priest by use of magic, Now he was a magician, I am not He was a wizard of some kind, and he had power And that power still exists down in the tomb In case we need to use it in the future It was not used for many centuries Up until when it was last used by my master.

Barry: 36:17

Can I stroll in at this point?

Mark: 36:19

Okay.

Barry: 36:21

I'd like to think, Mark, that somehow I have acquired a nice glass of wine or something as I'm walking in.

Mark: 36:28

All right, well, the bottle and the glass in your hand.

Barry: 36:33

I'm literally going to sit down and go, oh, my God, I'm so sorry I'm late. What did I miss?

Mark: 36:37

I think he has missed everything.

Barry: 36:41

I didn't i didn't miss um us nearly dying to in the place that someone sent us to.

Mark: 36:49

Ah see but you have not died you are here sitting that's what i.

Stephen: 36:52

Told him but it didn't make him feel any better that time and it probably won't this time.

Mark: 36:58

And.

Barry: 36:58

It was significantly closer than i usually like to get.

Mark: 37:03

This is not the time to speak of such things be positive my friend.

Barry: 37:07

I'm positive he fucked us over.

Mark: 37:11

He looks a bit nervous which I believe he really should so I'm you know I'm going to go with this compensation I.

Stephen: 37:19

Think he's talking about.

Mark: 37:22

It's in case should tell you what this is his vision.

Little Mark: 37:26

What?

Mark: 37:26

My master, René Mascoudet, see, he only died three weeks ago. And on his deathbed, he has a vision of the return of Heimlich Kemmler, as this is….

Little Mark: 37:43

So you knew this was going to happen?

Mark: 37:45

No, no, no. It's only a vision. And he said on his deathbed that Kemmler will return, and the Blue-Blooded Bandits will be part of this, the tombs. And so I thought, well, I've always wanted to write a book about the Blue-Blooded Bandits. Why do I not get people in to help me investigate the vision in some way, as well as write the book I've always wanted to write?

Barry: 38:20

So you suspected that something like this might happen?

Mark: 38:26

My master's is...

Barry: 38:27

Sent us out there without sharing that suspicion.

Mark: 38:33

I said...

Barry: 38:34

Should anything like that happen in our future dealings, it will go very badly.

Mark: 38:40

I promise you it will not.

Stephen: 38:43

Yeah, I can't see it getting any worse.

Mark: 38:45

I respect your understanding in this matter.

Barry: 38:49

Okay, continue. And I'm going to take a big old slurp of my vino.

Little Mark: 38:54

We still don't know what's in this crypt yet, do we?

Stephen: 39:01

Big stuff.

Mark: 39:02

I was a very young monk when Kemmler attacked us since he passed, and he had no undead army. He was not as powerful as this. but it was a box of some kind the box was used to, to release some magic my master was very powerful and this box released this magic and it destroyed, it weakened him and then he struck him with a staff a staff of withering and took his power and his energies away.

Stephen: 39:38

Well not permanently.

Mark: 39:41

Well he fled and well the armies of Paravon and of the empire came looking for him and they searched and searched for his body but nothing was found, it was assumed that it was eaten by wolves and.

Little Mark: 40:00

Right, so we're going down there to look for a box.

Mark: 40:04

There is, in fact, Monty has actually found the words, the rumour that there is magic in the crypt, that my old master was a guardian of. This knowledge was not passed on to me.

Jon: 40:20

He was your librarian, I've just asked questions.

Mark: 40:24

Padre just nods and, yes, it wasn't, that's not true. So the young man here has been very instrumental in finding this out. Hopefully it will have some use. John Lewis says, well, we were thinking, because we have the dwarves and many of the other stronger people are either leaving and we cannot stop them or I hope in the main defense is that if you were to go down into the crypts, it is rumored that the crypts had some form of defense on them. uh yes thank you for sharing that yes oh traps yes that's it i would be as transparent as i possibly can from this point onwards the trip that the the traps in the the crap i i say this because they are defended for um for interlopers or anybody they have to be yeah they're protected.

Stephen: 41:20

You know how to get around these traps.

Jon: 41:21

When you inter somebody, how do they bypass the traps?

Mark: 41:27

The place where we inter our dead, there is nothing there. It must be further in.

Jon: 41:39

Do you have... You have bills, records from the people that were employed to make these. We might get an idea of, you know, I turn one needle track in this location. That would be really useful.

Mark: 41:57

We do not keep our receipts from 800 years ago.

Stephen: 42:01

You should do, and you never know when the tax man's coming round.

Jon: 42:04

Not here. They don't pay taxes to avoid your turn.

Stephen: 42:07

It gives you a smug look.

Mark: 42:10

Because there's no taxes here.

Stephen: 42:12

Oh, well, that's why you didn't keep the receipts. Right. That's clear.

Little Mark: 42:18

So just to make sure I understand this correctly, we're going down into a dungeon where there's traps to find a box and a staff to come back and deal with the bloke.

Mark: 42:26

Is that right? This is not correct. It is not a dungeon. What game are you playing at?

Jon: 42:32

It's all right. Joe's not playing. We can say it.

Stephen: 42:34

There's no dungeons in Warhammer. There's sewers and crypts.

Mark: 42:37

It's not a dungeon. No, no, no, no. It is a crit. a holy place, a sacred place you have some respect.

Little Mark: 42:43

A holy place full of traps.

Mark: 42:46

Some traps perhaps.

Jon: 42:49

Very dangerous you go first.

Mark: 42:53

And a box of some kind and hopefully a staff that will help us and where is your other friend, the ranger.

Stephen: 43:01

Oh picking nuts I think.

Mark: 43:05

He is collecting food bones.

Jon: 43:07

For soup maybe.

Mark: 43:09

He has ran away, let's be honest.

Stephen: 43:11

I reckon.

Little Mark: 43:13

The person, yeah.

Mark: 43:15

We have no time. We have no time. I do have any questions.

Little Mark: 43:20

Yeah, where are the traps?

Mark: 43:22

I do not know. I don't know. He kept his magical activities to himself.

Stephen: 43:27

What type of traps are we looking at?

Mark: 43:28

Lest anyone here be tempted to meddle with them, we do not have the power to control them. We bring unknown dangers upon ourselves. you had some kind of lab as opposed.

Jon: 43:40

To the known dangers.

Mark: 43:43

The knowledge died with him regardless. We do not have any wizards with us now. When I was a young initiate, though, the rumour was that he had some kind of laboratory and maybe some magical guards of some kind, protections, to stop anyone but himself from entering.

Little Mark: 44:01

So now there's magical traps?

Mark: 44:04

There were rumours at the time when I was younger. It was many, many years ago.

Jon: 44:09

Well, spells fade with time, sure.

Stephen: 44:12

Yeah. Yeah, it'd be fine.

Mark: 44:15

But if you can find this great weapon of which was told, bring it forth, it could save us, Null.

Little Mark: 44:22

It could...

Mark: 44:25

We will do our best to hold out until you return the resist.

Jon: 44:29

The quicker we do this, rather than sit around that ring, possibly.

Mark: 44:33

Time is of the essence.

Barry: 44:36

Okay. Not a fan of Crips, but let's go.

Little Mark: 44:40

No, no, I might.

Jon: 44:42

Well, we'll need illumination. Other than that, I think we'll be okay.

Barry: 44:46

That is a fair point. Is there anything we need before we go down there that we can get him to provide us?

Little Mark: 44:51

Torches.

Barry: 44:51

We need as many torches as we can carry.

Mark: 44:56

So, yeah, he can supply torches. Also, healing draft. He can provide a healing draft, one for each of you, which you can either take immediately.

Barry: 45:03

And did we get some healing while we were here, Mark?

Mark: 45:06

Yeah. I didn't roll for Silas, though. Do you want me to do that now? That would have been...

Barry: 45:10

Yeah, go on.

Mark: 45:11

Let's have a quick... Oh, I've rolled brilliantly. So, you've got six wounds plus your toughness bonus back.

Barry: 45:18

We've got 10s on it.

Little Mark: 45:18

So, he told me it's like I'm going to be 40 or something like that.

Barry: 45:21

Well, do you know what? That puts me, that's more than I need. That puts me like above max.

Mark: 45:25

Okay. So everyone's got a healing draft and you can take that once only and only one healing draft. So you can't provide others with yours and it will give you back your toughness bonus in wounds immediately as you take it.

Little Mark: 45:39

Bizarrely, I didn't take many that much damage falling off the, the, the clear fit was drowning that killed me.

Mark: 45:44

Yeah. That's always the way in it.

Little Mark: 45:45

Yeah. Yeah.

Jon: 45:46

Well, you're looking remarkably spry for a drowned person.

Little Mark: 45:49

I know. Do you know what I mean? Yeah.

Stephen: 45:50

He's got better.

Little Mark: 45:51

As fate would have had it, I survived.

Mark: 45:56

Fate had something better in store for me. Exactly. A more humiliating death away.

Little Mark: 46:01

Yeah, exactly. I'm here to die by a stupid trap. That's what I'm here to die, Maya.

Barry: 46:06

You know what? That is my worst thought going forward now, is that I'm just going to step on a floorboard and fucking die. Like, I can see it. Yeah.

Mark: 46:16

You've got fate points at least.

Jon: 46:17

If you can see it, don't tread on it.

Mark: 46:19

That's it for today. we'll be back in the next episode with the descent into the crypt thanks guys see you next time.